5 Board Games That Will Probably Become Movies

Rihanna gets her paycheck Battleship on.

As long as there is source material in this world, you can bet Hollywood will buy the rights to it and turn it into a movie. At first it was books and plays, and then comics, concept albums and worse books. Then, in 1985, we got Clue. I love Clue actually. Tim Curry, Madeline Kahn, and Christopher Lloyd running around a mansion murdering people and being sassy? I’m in. But Clue set a dangerous precedent – the usage of a board game as inspiration for a major motion picture.

“Mrs. Peacock was a man?”

Jumping ahead to 2012, audiences around the world will soon be treated to the travesty of Battleship. Starring Liam Neeson and Rihanna, this summer  “blockbuster” is looking to be a public service announcement on how not to spend $200 million. Yes, I’m being highly critical of a product I’ve yet to see, but that product is a movie based on the game Battleship. Couple that with news that Adam Sandler is set to star in a live-action version of Candyland, and I’d say the Mayan calendar might not be too far off-base.

In the spirit of board games being the newest craze for uninspired screenwriters, here are five board games I fear may make the leap to the big screen.

1. Don’t Wake Daddy

Potential Plot:  Following the success of Precious, this movie chronicles the domestic abuse endured by two children at the hands of their drunken, depressive father. Ultimately about the redemptive power of love and the strength of family.

Cast:  Elle Fanning (Daughter), Asa Butterfield  (Son), Nicole Kidman (Mother) and Christoph Waltz (Daddy). Features a touching supportive turn by Don Cheadle as Wise Grocer.

Chance It Could Happen? None. I don’t think they even sell this game anymore.

2. Settlers of Catan

Does anyone else think the people in this promo photo are dressed way too nicely?

Potential Plot: A big budget historical action flick, set in the medieval European world of Catan. Four warring factions of a fractured kingdom duke it out for riches, glory and wool. Think Game of Thrones meets Zack Snyder.

Cast: Christopher Lee as a feeble king fearful for his crown. Laura Linney as his brooding queen. Chris Hemsworth as the arrogant prince from a rival kingdom. Jonah Hill provides comic relief as a drunken ore refiner.

Chance It Could Happen? High. Settlers of Catan is immensely popular at the moment. The complexity of the game coupled with its appealing setting make it a prime candidate to be ruined in film form.

Similar Posts


  1. The thing about battleship is they seemingly chose a licensed IP in order to make extra money so it would have some name recognition. But if they ignored that and made the EXACT same movie and called it something like “SS kick the alien’s ass” it wouldn’t get mocked nearly as much because honestly, it looks like a pretty fun action movie. But how many people won’t see it because the idea of a battelship movie is fucking retarded?

  2. Am I the only one who has seen a distinct difference between the first trailer for Battleship and the last? The first was more or less the “ooh, we are trapped inside a dome with some aliens”, and the last “fuck the ip! Let’s do it the transformers meets transformers 3-way!”?

    Number 5 could actually be a very interesting and psycological movie.

  3. I definitely went off and downloaded Clue after reading this article. I forgot it was even a movie, and I certainly never knew Tim Curry was in it, or I would have gone out of my way to see it a long time ago.

  4. Funny thing about Clue is, when it was being shown in theaters, it had a different ending depending on where you saw it. Why can’t they do that more often with movies? It would be a cool idea to use if they ever make the Mass Effect games into movies. As for Battleship, between Disney making a successful franchise from an amusement park ride and me needing stuff to do with my 12-year-old nephew this summer, I’ll give it a chance.

  5. I think the time is right for a Hungry, Hungry, Hippo’s game. With CGI, we could have a community of anthropomorphic hippos who live in a land where for some reason, there is way too much food. Every year, a teenage hippo is picked from each area to compete where they must eat so much of the food. But, every once in awhile, a bomb is thrown into the mess and the hippo kids must not eat the bomb, or they will explode. The last hippo who hasn’t died of overeating or exploding food is the winner. It could be the anti hunger games movie.

  6. There is actually a good novel based on ‘The Settlers of Catan’. I don’t know, if it was released in the US, but it’s available in Germany for almost 10 years. I’m actually shocked, they did no a movie by now and still hope, it will be announced in the next few years.

    Also, it is pretty clear imho, Klaus Teuber and the Catan GmbH would not grant the license if the script is rubbish.

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.