Winter TV’s 10 Biggest Badasses of 2009

Winter may be a pretty terrible season for movie and game relases, but these cold months mark some of the best TV we’ve seen in a long time. Some shows are back from their Christmas break while others are finally surfacing after the writer’s strike, which now seems like an eternity ago. These ten men represent that best and boldest of their returning shows, and will either lead them to great success or their doom. Here are the ten biggest badasses of winter TV.

10. Murray Hewitt


Sure on Flight of the Conchords Murray went from millionaire agent to broke agent in the span of about ten minutes, but he’s still leading the boys to inevitable fame and fortune as folk singers. And recently, his Nigerian investment strategy paid off pretty handsomely, so he’s now got the cash to get things happening (or not happening) in the music biz again.

9. Christian Troy


On Nip/Tuck Christian continues to be the ladies man we all know and hate, despite the fact that he’s fighting off breast cancer. Who else do you know man enough to do that? Plus he’s much more of a man than his pansy ass partner, Sean, who’s faking a wheelchair disability because he’s too lazy to be a doctor again.

8. Jack Donaghy


Everyone’s favorite executive on 30 Rock, Jack exudes cool and collectedness that is counterbalanced with the awkward pile of mess that is Liz Lemon. He knows everything there is to know about late night programming and microwave ovens. Plus, he’s banged Condolezza Rice.

7. Gregory House


There are many ways to be a badass, and being a doctor that diagnoses disease by committing felonies and sometimes hitting people certainly qualifies for that. Plus, he works with Olivia Wilde, and everyone knows that if you even are standing within six feet as her, it automatically makes you a badass.

6. Chuck Bass


Yes, from Gossip Girl. **** you. Bass is a badass in the sense that he can intimidate without throwing a punch. Wrong him and he can destroy your entire reputation by sending a photo of you with an underage transsexual prostitute to everyone you’ve ever met. And he’s not even old enough to drink. How does he do it? Well, he’s Chuck Bass.

5. Dwight Schrute


The Office‘s resident purple belt is just as much of a badass as ever, fighting (kind of) for the woman he loves and sabotaging rival paper companies with James Bond like sleuthing. He’s the total package. And in case that wasn’t enough, remember he’s the fire marshall, an ex-volunteer sheriff’s deputy, and has weapons stashed in every nook and cranny of the office.

4. Desmond Hume


There are a myriad of people competing on Lost for the badass title, most notely Jack, Locke, Ben, Sawyer, but it goes to the often overlooked Desmond. Now with Season 5 firmly planted in the decidedly un-firm ground of time travel, only Desmond seems to be immune to it’s warping effects, making him more important than ever before.

3. Bill Adama


Admiral Adama has his hands full this season on Battlestar Galactica. He just found out his best friend is a robot, he lead the entire human race to what seems like certain destruction, and now faces a mutiny lead by his one-legged subordinate. Things have been better, but you can bet Adama is man enough to get through it.

2. Michael Westen


Watch just one episode of Burn Notice on USA, and if you don’t think Michael Westen is one of the most badass people on television, you’re an idiot. The ex-spy now leads a kind of Grand Theft Auto-in-reverse life, performing dangerous missions for the betterment of the community. And he has a hot-ass Irish ex-girlfriend.

1. Jack Bauer


Could anyone else but Jack ever top this list? No way, not even if Chuck Norris somehow came back reprising his role as Walker, Texas Ranger. Jack is now fighting African cyber terrorists, and though there hasn’t been time for many moments of badassery yet, you can be damn sure the season will be full of plenty of them.

Sorry, no Brenda Johnson.

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