V Review: “There is No Normal Anymore”

Well, things were bound to slow down after last week’s tsunami of a pilot, which had more plot twists and reveals than an entire season of Lost. And slow down they did, to the point where practically nothing happened this time around. With only two more episodes to go before V’s incredibly poorly timed break until March, I have to wonder what exactly it is they’re building toward.

This week centered on the FBI’s investigation to find out just what happened to Dale. It appears even with aliens hovering outside your window, an agent going missing for more than 12 hours is priority one.

Last time we saw Dale, Erica had just split his head open with a metal bar to reveal his alien lizardness underneath. Now she’s playing along like she doesn’t know what happened, only to get called on her bullshit when her boss plays her a 911 call she made shortly after escaping the warehouse.

The other warehouse escapee, Father Jack, is also being questioned by the FBI, but not because of Dale, because of the stabbing victim who died at his church. At first he lies to the FBI, saying the man said nothing about the Vs, then his conscience gets the better of him, and he shares the package of photos the man gave him with the FBI’s “V Threat Assessment Task Force” which is totally not made up of V agents. Was that what’s-her-face-Ms.-Cylon from BSG, or am I imagining things? In any case, as the rule goes, if you’re good looking, you’re a suspect.

Elsewhere, news anchor Chad is beating himself up about playing softball with Anna during his big nightly interview. He decides he’s going to shake the beehive by hosting a panel discussion about whether or not the Vs are to be trusted. Anna gets upset (or at least as upset as Anna can get) and summons him to the ship, where he defends himself, saying that in the end, the debate was good for public opinion of the Vs.

“This just in, the aliens are still hot.”

The Vs are now trying to open up diplomatic negotiations with all the major countries of the world, which is strange, because I thought they sort of did that already when Anna flew to the UN and promised everyone universal health care. Shouldn’t the world be negotiating as one on this? But yeah, we’d never all end up cooperating, even if aliens did show up. That’s international relations for you.

The final two plots of the night involve Ryan meeting an old traitor buddy of his, who surprise, turns traitor on him and tells him he should leave his wife to keep her safe from the coming doom that is sure to befall him. And Erica’s son Tyler is officially a card carrying V Ambassador now, with a little suit and everything. Hell, I’d put on a goofy costume and pass out flyers if it made Laura Vandervoort talk to me. But as soon as flirting starts with Lisa, it stops, because Tyler gets into a fight with an anti-V troublemaker, he’s threatened with expulsion from the ambassadors because the Vs don’t want no trouble now. Lisa is pissed because she recommended Tyler, and walks her sweet alien ass away, leaving him forlorn with only an iPhone picture to remember her by.

“You traveled 25,000 light years to get here, and you’re a goddamn mechanic?”

I’m not as pumped after this episode as I was after the pilot, but I suppose that’s to be expected. There wasn’t a whole lot of action, other than one chase scene where Father Jack and Erica run away from a spiky alien ball.

How exactly are Erica and Father John going to start a “resistance?” What really can you do against aliens that won’t get you completely obliterated by ray guns and holographic snakes? Even their little 9/11 Truth-type meeting got busted up by the V, and they weren’t even remotely organized yet.

I’m also curious at the vast disparities between the infiltrated Vs and the ship Vs. The ship Vs seems pretty cold, calculating and well, inhuman. The earthbound ones are married or engaged and have been for some time, and act like normal people. Is that because they’ve just adjusted to human emotions on earth after a long while? Or is there truly something different about them?

I was glad to see Alan Tudyk return as Dale at the end of the episode. The Vs have some sort of healing station that’s half Cylon rebirthing chamber and half Wanted steam bath. Judging from the scar on Dale’s head, he wasn’t given a new body, but it’s pretty clear that the Vs are able to be brought back from the dead somehow, making this “resistance” even more futile than it already is.

Tune in next week…

Prediction: Hot production assistant girls is a V. Evidence: She is hot.