I decided to scrap the “crappy” because let’s face it. Every single movie I recommend has to be for some kind of reason right? And whether I know it’s bad by movie standards, obviously the movie is good (or bad) enough that I feel you guys have to see it.
So let’s move on to this week’s recommendation: Beastmaster II: Through the Portal of Time. Now, clearly the original Beastmaster is a classic. It’s kind of like a very poor man’s Conan or any other movie that’s set in those weird dark times when swords, muscles, and weird magic prevailed.
In this crazy follow up to the 1982 original, Dar (Marc Singer), is a warrior who can still talk to the beasts. He is forced to travel to Earth to stop his evil brother from stealing an atomic bomb and turning their native land from a desert into…a desert.
Oh yeah, they do this through a time portal. The movie has ridiculous unintentional comedy and the best part? The chick who plays Ursa in Superman II and Kari Wuhrer (almost naked) are in this flick. Wuhrer is kind of showing Dar around early 1990s Los Angeles and hilarity ensues.
You have to see this movie, if only for the early 90s gear you see in a mall.
Did I tell you to see this or did I tell you?