Five Legal and Mundane Things I Do in Grand Theft Auto


Most of us play Grand Theft Auto to cause as much havoc as we can. Paint the town red with a huge tank, gun down as many gang bangers, and run over innocent pedestrians as much as you want. Sometimes that’s all we do in the game. The title of the franchise speaks for itself. As much as I spend a huge chunk of the game being a psychopath with a penchant for destruction, sometimes I can also be a law-abiding citizen.

In a game where violence is encouraged, it gets tiring to do the same thing all over again. Regardless if you are killing someone or blowing cars up, repetition is pretty much buzzkill.

So sometimes it’s actually fun to follow the rules for a change.

1. Drive Safe 


At one point, we’ve all had that moment when we’ve decided to try and obey the traffic laws. Let’s follow the traffic lights and try to drive like how we normally do in real life. I’m assuming you don’t trash your car every minute and murder a random pedestrian due to your reckless driving. Traffic? You could just ram through it, but why be a misfit? Let’s just blend in and wait during traffic. You don’t always You’ve also tried not jaywalk and absolutely tried your best to find a pedestrian lane.

until you break your streak and finally hit one pedestrian. Oh, what the hell! You are back to your old ways…


2. Pay for a prostitute and NOT kill her to get your money back


I thought I was the only one who killed prostitutes to get my money back. I went on the internet and realized that a lot of people had the same idea because they were as cheap as me. I was always intrigued by this and how a lot players did this without realizing that’s what others did. In fact, this happens often in open-world games but that’s for another article.

Anyway, there are moments when I feel a shred of humanity while playing Grand Theft Auto. Prostitutes are hard working women! They have to feed three children and support an alcoholic husband. Let’s give them our money for a change instead of resorting to murder. She needs it to get out of that trailer park and have a better life for her family! Give back to your community by properly compensating working girls. 

3. Make an honest living


The GTA games have a lot of criminal activities to give you loads of dough, but sometimes we just need something we can relate to. People say video games are a form of escapism, but it’s interesting how people mimic real life by doing honest work for example. There are times when I spend hours doing the taxi, vigilante, and ambulance side missions to earn extra cash.

Bank robberies, home invasions, and drug deals? Please, that’s so overrated. Taxi driving is the way brother.

4.  Turn yourself in


During your ‘I’ll be good’ phase, you might be inclined to turn yourself in every time you earn a star. You would gladly walk towards the cops and get yourself busted even if it was just for one star. You’re a good guy like that or you might just be interested in sneaking inside the police station to get that dildo.

Either way you didn’t kill a cop! That’s one less from the hundreds you’ve killed. At least that’s something.

5. Buy stuff instead of stealing


Maybe you’re just rich because you use cheats or you really want GTA to be realistic. It’s hard to quit stealing cars especially since we crash our vehicles every so often. However, at one point we decide to completely go legit by spending our hard earned money from taxi driving on cars. We never actually use them on missions because we totally know that the cars we use can disappear for no reason during cutscenes. Those legit vehicles are probably only good for driving your dates or travelling to and from safe houses.

Like attempting to drive safe, you will eventually revert back to your old ways once your legit car explodes in front of your eyes. Yes, the hours or days you spent driving a cab was for nothing.

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  1. Disgusting. Trevor would be so disappointed in you, Benny….what was your last name again, Kindness? Benny Kindness doesn’t have that same badass ring to it. GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER! DO YOU EVEN LIFT, BENNY?! WELL DO YOU?! **pant** **pant**

    Look, just get out there and slaughter some motherfrackin’ whores (after banging them, natch), drive on the sidewalk, and massacre cops with RPG’s right now, and we’ll just forget this whole thing happened. [whispers] I’ve been swerving to avoid civilians. I think there’s something wrong with me too.

  2. I don’t think most people do these to feel normal; I think this is like a fetish’s fetish. The norm in GTA games is to cause as much death and destruction as possible, so to really break the rules of the game you have to play it like real life.

    I thought of this because I was just watching the episode of 30 Rock last night where Jenna and Paul fell asleep in each other’s arms and, since they HAD to do weird sex stuff for everything, called it “normaling.” I imagine what you are doing is the video game equivalent of normaling.

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