Jennifer Aniston to Annoy James Bond in Next Film?

jennifer-aniston.jpg

Forget Josh Hartnett in Thor, this is one casting rumor that has the potential to be truly terrifying, Jennifer Aniston as the next Bond girl. How the hell did this all start?

The latest rumor cooking up at the Daily Express (as outlined on Ace Showbiz) states that after Aniston told Elle Magazine that she’d love to do a James Bond action flick with Daniel Craig, she perked up the ears over at EON, Bond’s production company.

The source is quoted as saying: “We’re always looking for the next Bond girl. She has to be beautiful but she also needs to have brains. It helps if she’s athletic and able to keep up with the intense stunt work a Bond movie demands. Jennifer has all these qualities. It’s great to hear she’d love to do a movie because we have used established actresses before such as Teri Hatcher and Denise Richards. It’s great she’s a fan.”

The source went on to say that it’s likely she’ll now be called in to meet with producers as another sequel starts brewing.

I’ve been waiting to express my disdain for Jennifer Aniston for a while now, but haven’t had the chance because she never does anything remotely relevant. But start trying to cast her a Bond girl, and yeah, you’ve got my attention.

1) Jennifer Aniston is not hot. I don’t care what you say, she is simply not. She can be photoshopped to look halfway decent (see above), but she is just not a good looking individual.

2) Jennifer Aniston is not a good actress. Friends was a good show, but it had little to do with Aniston individually, and ever since it ended she has been playing varying versions of Rachel to different amounts of success, usually ranging from none (Along Came Polly) to almost none (The Break Up) to moderate (Marley and Me).

3) If no one is talking about her, she’ll start doing something controversial like hook up with/break up with John Mayer, or take her clothes off for a “controversial” scene in The Break Up (the only reason anyone saw that movie) or for the cover of GQ as demonsrated above.

I could go on, but I guess the only one that’s really relevant to this topic is #2. There is no possible way she could hold her own dramatically in something as big as a Bond movie. Also, Terri Hatcher and Denise Richards were horrible in their Bond movies, so don’t use that as an example.

I heard that Slumdog Millionaire‘s Frieda Pinto is rumored to be in the next Bond movie as well. Here’s hoping she gets the lead, and Aniston gets to be the girl Bond has sex with then immediately dies thereafter.

7 Comments

  1. Will March 18, 2009
  2. Denely March 25, 2009
  3. Denely March 25, 2009
  4. mr ass April 16, 2009
  5. albert February 15, 2010
  6. Sacha Leech September 12, 2010
  7. Da Cuntstabber May 7, 2011

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