Come On ‘Vampire’s Assistant,’ I’m Trying to Like You!


So why did you come out with this horrendously shitty poster? Whatever this kid’s name is, he’s not remotely cute or a Robert Pattinson look-a-like, so you’re not going to trick Twi-tards into seeing this. And John C. Reily is certainly not Taylor Lautner.

This movie looks to be a welcome, fresh take on a genre taken over by stupidity and teenagers, so don’t go mucking it up. I think I can make out Salma Hayek, but who the hell is that behind her? He’s so damn small I need to blow this thing up in photoshop just to see who it is. And I’m still going to go with “vague fog man” after further investigation.


  1. Madison August 26, 2009
  2. Josh August 26, 2009
  3. SirEdward August 26, 2009
  4. Paul Tassi August 26, 2009
  5. Frank August 29, 2009

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