Remember when computer games like King’s Quest and Space Quest required you to enter commands instead of simply pointing and clicking? “Don’t Sh*t Your Pants” is exactly like that, but the goal is, uh, self-explanatory. Have fun on Washington’s birthday with this free game from kongregate.com (via Kotaku). There’s something like ten possible endings to this “game;” see how many you can get. I quit playing after I managed to take a dump on the floor. Click HERE to play!