Dexter Review: “This Little Piggy”

Episode 805

And that’s a wrap folks! Thanks for tuning into this final season of Dexter, where everything worked out just great and we only needed five episodes to tell his final story! It’s one of brotherly love and family bonding and it all works out in the end!

But seriously, that was a rather weird episode of Dexter that appeared to tie up the major plotline of the season right under our noses. I was waiting for a big turn in the final moments of the episode (Vogel stabs Deb! Deb crashes the boat into shore!), but none came.

So, what exactly is going on? It would appear that the two main conflicts, Dexter vs. Brain Surgeon and Dexter vs. Deb were wrapped up in a neat little bow last night. The latter is quite impressive specifically, as only forty minutes earlier, Deb had just almost killed Dexter, and by the end they’re bonded more than ever. I was happy that Dexter finally got mad at Deb for acting crazy, however shortlived that ended up being. “Oh…you! I could never stay mad at you for something as silly as attempted fratricide!”

dexter piggy2

I have a thing (a bad thing) about people touching my feet, so this is pretty much my worst nightmare.

As for the first bit? Well, I’m not sure we have to continue to question Vogel’s motives as surprise, she really WAS in danger from one of her crazy ex-patients, and did in fact need Dexter’s help to resolve the situation. Many of us suspected this was some grand form of manipulation, but really, the only “bad” thing Vogel’s done is write down some notes on the whole process.

What I am NOT convinced of as of yet, however, is that AJ actually was the brain surgeon killer. Yes, it’s awfully convenient that he had a piece of his brain removed, but it’s weird to give a serial killer two separate MOs, killing women with an anti-obsession about feet, and then killing regular dudes (or making them kill each other) and hacking out a piece of their brains to leave on her doorstep. And note that AJ never actually mentioned doing that. The focus was only on the girls. Yes, he went after Vogel, but only after he learned she had sent Dexter after him.

So in short, I don’t think we’re done with this plotline, despite the happy ending we got this week. If we were, that would mean we’re stuck with all the stupid subplots we’re currently enduring, and they’re simply crafting an entirely new story for the last seven episodes, which would be a pretty stupid way to structure the last season.  I am still waiting for Hannah to show up somehow, though that really doesn’t feel like natural story progression at this point.

dexter piggy3

Jamie wins the award for “character I was sure would die three season ago but is still here.”

And yes, the subplots continue to get progressively more stupid as time goes on. Quinn is tasked with solving the most bland murder the show’s ever seen, obviously committed by Kid McCreepy, but he can’t pursue it because the family is a big donor to Miami Metro. The drama! And what is Daniels even still doing there? Didn’t he retire? I’m really, really, really hoping Quinn becomes relevant by the end of the season, but it’s not looking good. They’ve carved out this little piece of the show to be just a bland episode of CSI, and it sucks.

Then of course there’s the even more useless plot of Masuka’s gold-digging daughter who I predict, shocker, will turn out NOT to be a gold-digger. Deb will find something suspicious in her background check, Masuka will accuse her, she will cry, it will be some big misunderstanding. If there ends up being any more to this plotline I will be surprised.

The best part of the episode was Dexter figuring out a clever way to get out of dinner without pissing off Jamie. The second best part was him killing AJ with that curtain rod like Jason would kill a whimpering teenager in a Friday the 13th sequel.

I don’t know, this season isn’t at all what I expected. I think the brain surgeon will end up being the ultimate big bad, and the fact that it’s being kept secret for this long probably means that it’s someone we know. I would guess Hannah, but then they really shouldn’t have publicized her return so much. Past her, I’m not sure who else it could be who is even still alive at this point. Lumen? But what would she have to do with Vogel? If it was just some other random, I’m not sure how impactful that would be. Or I could have completely misread this entire situation and AJ really was the brain surgeon, but that would be the strangest situation of all to me.

What did you make of last night’s rather conclusory episode? What about the season as a whole?

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11 Comments

  1. Nice review, here’s my points:
    I wasn’t able to avoid the “on the next…”, as they usually put it like a millisecond after the last scene, and that looked so immensely stupid I can’t even believe it…so I’m taking a leap of faith and put it on bad bad bad editing.

    Masuka’s storyline is one of the few Dexter subplots that really have my attention. Mainly because Masuka is an interesting character that I’d like to see get a little more depth to him before it’s over.

    Other than that, what the hell…the structure of this show is beyond confusing and extra anticlimatic. It’s like they don’t want there to be any kind of suspense, no antogonist, no believable conflict. It’s just: shit happens ->resolution, shit happens -> resolution.

  2. I can’t even begin to describe my disappointment when Vogel escaped having her toes broken. I’ve never looked forward to anything on Dexter as much as I did when I saw the pliers on her toes in last week’s previews.

    What a shitty way to wrap this show up. Every aspect of this season is not just jarringly inane, it’s worse. It’s lame.

    You can see the monumental amount of shit not given by the cast, in each and every scene.

    If Showtime just came out and said, “hey, sorry, it sucked so much we decided to have it put down, instead of letting it linger in agony.” and flat out canceled the series, I’m pretty sure most people would rank it as the best possible ending for the show at this point.

  3. Vogel is probably the Brain Surgeon, both The Surgeon and Vogel listen to the same song “Make Your Own Kind Of Music”, also Vogel keeps all her logs on discs, The Brain Surgeon sent her a disc of the the guy killing the other guy. Either way, I’m not too keen on Vogel being The Brain Surgeon and I’m not too keen on Hannah coming back either…I’m not too keen on much this season.

    BTW, His name is Matthews, not Daniels. Matthews.

  4. Almost halfway through the season and we’re not really going anywhere, so I’m dissapointed. If Vogel is the Brain Surgeon I’m dissapointed, it would be predictable and a bit cliche. I just can’t imagine that will be a good end of the series (taking into account the lack of really high quality for 4 seasons now). But it is clear, I think, that the Brain Surgeon isn’t AJ, the next episodes will go on with him. They could simply reignite his existence by sending another package to Vogel (who should really invest in a security system).

  5. Does anyone really care who the Brain-Surgeon is? I just can’t wait for it all to be over..it’s boring, contrived, cheesy drivel right now. They should just stop what they’re doing and air season 1…with an apology.

    Not to worry, Boardwalk Empire, Sons Of Anarchy, and BREAKING BAD will be here soon to wash away the bad taste of Dexter.

  6. I feel bad about the neighbor chick. I mean she suddenly appeared in front of Dexter after the brain surgeon left the notice about Vogel’s friend. But its kind of small to know, and they seem to be heading to Zach-Quinn-Dexter plot so I don’t know.

  7. neighbor chick seems to be too innocent to be some brutal villan:) I cannot imagine how Dex will go out with her after he has experienced Hannah, Lumen or Lila…

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