Badass Picture of the Week: The D.E.N.N.I.S. System Works


A post for Always Sunny fans only, this picture shows the patented D.E.N.N.I.S. system in action, which has allowed Dennis to get in good with both The Waitress and Christina Hendricks, aka. Joan Holloway from Mad Men, aka Saffron from Firefly, aka the hottest woman on television today.

For those of you who need a refresher course on how the system can work this well for you:

D: Demonstrate value
E: Engage physically
N: Nurture dependence
N: Neglect emotionally
I: Inspire hope
S: Separate entirely

But once you land Christina Hendricks, there is no earthly reason for the last step.

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  • Madison

    I’d be more than happy to swim in Dennis’ wake when he was through with Christina.

    Move in After Closure.

  • Shocker

    Hell, I’d take the scraps from Frank, though I don’t quite have a wad of hundreds on me at the moment.

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  • PissBoy

    FYI…I would seriously hope he’s in good with ‘The Waitress’ considering 1) she’s a primary cast member and 2) She and Charlie are married IRL. Just thought you might want to have that little bit straight.

  • sal

    Christina Hendricks is married so I guess it’s “yay banging recently married chicks” day huh?

  • uh huh

    Dennis is married to the hot pharmacist who he employed the D.E.N.N.I.S. system on in that episode.

  • The female version of the D.E.N.N.I.S. system:

    D-Dress to impress
    E-Expect a date
    A-Avoid getting physical
    N-No “serious” talks
    D-Drop off the face of the earth
    R-Respond selectively
    A-Act like you’re not his girlfriend

  • I. Imply intelligence
    N. Nobody knows who you are
    T. Teenagers are formidable opponents for debate
    E. Eat nachos
    R. Rot in hell
    N. Nobody cares about you
    E. Eat nachos
    T. Take a gun and shoot yourself