The Phantom Menace Trailer That Can’t Possibly Be Real


…but it is. It’s very real.

It’s an official trailer for The Phantom Menace developed specifically to aim the 3D re-release of the movie at children, who are quite literally the only target demographic who might actually be excited about it.

Before I hear the usual “So what? They’re marketing a kids movie to kids, and there’s nothing wrong with the fact Lucas wanted kids to like the new films.” Something being a “kids movie” is still NEVER an excuse for it being complete shit. The Lion King, Wall-E, Tangled, How to Train Your Dragon and more might all be “kids movies” but they’re still fantastically animated and written and can be enjoyed by all ages. A four year old might laugh at Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked, but does that mean it’s “good”? No, and the same four year old would likely laugh if you jangled keys front of him.

And the narration of this trailer is so above and beyond what you’d ever expect to hear in an official spot, you almost PRAY it’s a parody, but alas, it isn’t. Here’s to hoping the cash grabbing 3D re-release of the biggest cinematic disappointment in history somehow manages to lose money.

  • Steve

    Sounds like the announcer for any recent nick/disney channel tv show aimed at kids and teens. Maybe the Wb as well. Wouldn’t be surprised if it is.

  • Still better than the actual Phantom Menace.

  • Scott

    This is pathetic and explains a lot. Lucas couldn’t make up his mind whether he wanted to make kid’s movies or an adult movie so he straddled the line and produced something that couldn’t possible succeed as either.

    The examples you bring up started from the standpoint of making a good kids movie, and then working in some subtle adult themes to make it enjoyable for all ages.

    Bottom line Lucas didn’t understand his content or his audience, the movie is Star WARS you don’t make a fucking war movie for kids!

  • WakyWizerdX

    I’m just hoping they re-release episode IV, V, and VI.

  • Ugo Strange

    I don’t wanna live on this planet anymore.

  • GamerEly

    when ep 1 originally came out I was very young, so I really enjoyed it, it appears thats the only crowd that really does enjoy it is the lower aged people. But this is straight up pandering, and the trailer reveals almost everythiiiiing for kids that have never seen it.

  • Diva D

    Who cares? The trailer for Drive made it look like an action movie. Ditto The Grey. In Bruges looked like a silly comedy. Now you can use marketing for a movie as proof of its quality? Give me a break.

    There’s another trailer out that sells the movie to adults, or to all ages, rather. This trailer is obviously specifically targeted to fairly young kids. This doesn’t prove jack, except to people who already hate Episode I.

  • Barretstrife

    not to play devils advocate… but could this be to get the audience of the cartoon clone wars and lego star wars?

  • Scott

    The cartoon Clone Wars is NOT a kid’s show.

  • Allicat

    Sadly, the commercial works. My 7 yr old, despite having been shown the ORIGINAL Star Wars (I don’t give a shit about those stupid numbers), is so psyched to see this. My husband and I are fighting over who gets to take him (the winner stays home).

  • Edzone


    Why fight when you can Pod Race!? 😀

    Wow! 😀

    Cool! 😀

    Watch out there Anakin! 😀

    Oh R2, you so silly! 😀

    YEAH! 😀


  • Vonter

    I know the following may not apply to this movie but; I hate when trailers tell me the whole movie.

  • Mike aka MonolithTMA

    I wish all trailers were this accurate and honest.