Please Don’t Be True: Ron Howard to Direct ‘Stretch Armstrong’


I’m just going to go ahead and file this under “idiotic rumors and reporting errors,” but I do have pause for at least a moment because this info comes out of Business Week, as opposed to say

A new article in the magazine discusses Hasbro’s new unholy relationship with Universal, and the the multitudes of awful movies they’ll be making together. I’ll save my ranting about toy-to-movie adaptations another day, but here’s the quote:

“There’s more on the way. Hasbro has a movie based on its G.I. Joe toy line coming out on Aug. 7. The company has an April 2011 release for a movie version of its Stretch Armstrong figure, to be directed by Ron Howard. That is part of a six-picture deal the company has with Universal Studios (GE), which included a movie version of Monopoly. Meanwhile, archrival Mattel (MAT) is working on movie versions of Hot Wheels and Major Matt Mason.”

Yup, that’s right, Ron Howard is directing Stretch Armstrong. Apparently he didn’t listen to my advice to go back to filming real movies as opposed to adaptations of poorly written and mostly blasphemous books, moving on instead to a children’s toy that frankly, children didn’t even like that much. This is surely a misprint, but it’s a pretty damn big one for Business Week to make. But I mean, if Ridley Scott is seriously making Monopoly, I suppose anything’s possible.

[via IESB]

P.S. Who the hell is Major Matt Mason?


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