I have been saying this FOREVER. The Onion is FINALLY getting it’s very own half hour TV show on Comedy Central, in a new deal reported by THR. Sadly, no credit is being given to me, the person who has been saying this for years, but hey, whatever, as long as it’s happening.
I’ve long believed The Onion would be a perfect companion piece to Stewart and Colbert as it’s PURE satire, and would be one level past Colbert on that spectrum of news reporting with seemingly legitimate news reporters, graphics and sets, all reporting on purely fictional news.
Wait, what’s that? The series is to be based soley on the Onion Sports Network and will only cover sports?
I’m not sure how many of you follow Megan Fox anymore but it’s become quite comical. The young actress has recently said that her new life purpose is to help children’s charities. You’ll have to excuse me while I go laugh my ass off in the other room.
I gotta say for a girl that is this attractive she sure finds ways to make me unattracted to her. And I tell ya it’s pretty hard to do when you’re THAT hot. I mean I used to think that Fox was incredible. And granted I wouldn’t throw her out of bed, she’s just doesn’t to it for me anymore.
I suppose the combination of horrible acting, teasing all of us with her sexual tirades, and talking shit to Michael Bay when she herself has zero talent has kind of gotten to me and altered my perception of her “beauty.”
So with all of this going on and Fox’s inevitable decline into obscurity (at least I think she’s headed there) when does the little lass sell out and bare all for Playboy?
Even better yet, when will she sink into the bowels of the porn industry?
I’m going with 2 years before Hefner scoops her up. Thoughts?
Nope. Gene Hackman hasn’t passed away or anything like that but don’t you think the world could use a little more of him? It’s like every single time I see a United Airlines ad or Oppenheimer Funds commercial I truly miss the guy.
Granted I know Mr. Hackman is approaching 80 and in a candid interview in 2004 said he was retired from acting, (confirmed in a book in 2008) that still doesn’t mean I wouldn’t mind some kind of an appearance. I mean at least show up in whatever new Superman movie comes out.
Hell, Leonard Nemoy looks like a frozen stiff but it was awesome seeing him in the new Star Trek. Wouldn’t Hackman be awesome in a comedy where he plays a perverted old man or something?
I know that Hackman is writing books with some archaeologist but come on buddy! We need ya! I don’t know, this is just my cry of the day and we could all use a little Norman Dale.
Wow, talk about a sell out. The guy is admitting to the overflow of remakes but feels it’s completely fine for THIS movie to be remade? And with Jaden Smith no less? Who the hell is gonna play Mr. Miyagi? Or Johnny Lawrence? Man I hope it’s Lil’ Bow Wow and Martin Lawrence plays Mr. Miyagi. And they better have that dude who screams “Put him in a body bag! Yeahhhh!!!!”
What amazed me however, is how ridiculous Macchio’s voice was in this interview. I mean really? Could you be more of one of those guys who meets 14-year-old girls in parks and stuff?
Good Lord I hope they fail miserably with this remake. God knows Macchio is kind of a tool right now but he was awesome back in the 80s. It’s hard to imagine that Karate Kid was made 25 years ago. Wow. Time sure as hell does fly.
My title is in response to this quote from Paramount chairman Brad Grey:
“We have the rights on a worldwide basis to do ‘Paranormal 2′ and we’re looking to see if that makes some sense.”
Did you mean, “makes some sense” as in would it fit in with the way the film ends and you’ve looked at Blair Witch 2 as a cautionary tale that says you shouldn’t do it? Or did you mean make sense because anything that can be made for $11K and be #1 at the box office the weekend before Halloween should automatically be given a sequel even if it’s written and filmed by a team of trained monkeys? Yeah, I thought so. Sigh.
So because we want to be all cool and web 2.0 and most of the thoughts in our head aren’t more than 140 characters long, we here at Unreality have decided to join Twitter. 90% of the tweets will be written by yours truly, and will consist of my random musings about the entertainment industry as well as links to cool articles both on our site and elsewhere.
I highly recommend you follow us here, and if you’re a reader, send me a direct message to say what’s up, just so I know you’re not an internet marketing spammer or a cam girl. I’ll follow you back and we can be Twitter pals for life.
ALSO, we are joining this newfangled thing called “Facebook,” and I suggest you become a fan of us here, where we’ll keep you updated on everything in the entertainment industry that takes MORE than 140 characters to talk about.
Alright, I’m going to leave this up all weekend, and I expect to have 50,000 followers and fans by Monday. Or ten. Ten would be nice.
The Disney Channel’s Selena Gomez is in final negotiations to star in What Boys Want, which yes, is a take off the Mel Gibson movie where he can read women’s minds. However, it will be Gomez who is doing the mind reading, and the victims will be teenage boys. Does anyone else see a problem here?
What is it you thought about constantly as a teenage boy? Hell, what is it you think about constantly now? And I can only imagine the types of things a bunch of fifteen year old guys would think if they saw someone like Selena Gomez staring intently at them.
So when I said this isn’t going to work, I meant as a concept, because surely the studio will have to completely fabricate what teenage boys think about, replacing “boobs” with “just a girl to have and hold” and “ass” with “someone who will listen to my problems.” This movie IS going to work commercially, and will do HUGE business when it releases, as a billion teenage girls will flock to the theaters, about to be desperately misled about what it is boys think about all day.
My nerdy way to propose. On October 15th 2009, it was out 5 year anniversary so i decided to propose. Using a program called lunar magic I was able to spell “lisa… Will you marry me?” she may not look too surprised in the video but you should of seen her afterwords, she couldn’t sit still!!! And no it wasn’t staged, but I did sit her down told her to play some Super Mario World, but she totally didn’t know she was being recorded!!
There are any number of things that could have gone on after the proposal. My guess is that she said “Yes, let’s finish the game.” Although there are probably a couple of alternatives like these:
“No, could you be any more of a dork? How did I ride this out for five years?”
“I’ve been having an affair with someone who actually has a penis. Goodbye.”
Seriously folks. I guess congratulations on the proposal but I’m about 99% sure this isn’t exactly the kind of couple I’d want to go out on a double date with.
