by Zack Ruskin

[$9 Trailers is a feature that examines movie trailers, and judges how well (or poorly) they execute their job of making me want to shell out nine bucks to see them. I thought this one paired well with my review of Chronicle that went up earlier today]

While every movie trailer exists for one reason only, the methods employed to get viewers in theaters are as varied as the films they advertise. Some genres of film have such predictable trailer formulas that you can actually watch the scenes before they appear:

- Katherine Heigel is committed to her job
- She meets a guy that’s perfectly wrong for her
- Cue the sappy power ballad
- Heigel makes a sweeping generalization about love while standing in the rain
- Up pops the film’s title

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by TJ Fink

The Super Bowl is an interesting time for non-sports fans. I know all the rules of football, understand most of the strategies, and genuinely enjoy a competitive game, but somehow it’s still infuriating to some of my NYC friends that I have no interest in picking a side. Oh well.

In truth, I look forward to Super Bowl commercials much more than the actual game. Some of them might be god-awful, but every now and then a clever ad pops up with some actual entertainment value. Segue time: I caught the latest Avengers teaser on Sunday night, and it got me thinking about the current state of superhero movies. My instinctive reaction to the trailer, of course, was “Holy shit! How could this film be anything short of amazing?” But then my cynical side chimed in and started an argument.

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Films like Kick-Ass and Super are enjoyable because they imagine what it might be like if the particularly brave or mentally ill decided to become superheroes despite having no actual powers. The reverse side of that, an everyman developing superhuman abilities, has been the subject of many comics throughout history, and is the origin story for the majority of our now-classic heroes.

But what if comic book lore was given a decidedly human twist? What if the people given those incredible powers were just three kids from your high school history class? Chronicle aims to well, chronicle what exactly that journey might look like.

For as much as “found footage” films are derided as of late as the newest trend in movie making to be exploited, I would argue that the fact remains that the majority of the films that use the tactic are in fact quite good. It may be personal taste, but I’ve very much enjoyed movies like Blair Witch, Rec, Paranormal Activity and so on. The only real film to use the style and breakout of the horror mold has been creature feature Cloverfield, but now we get to see a new genre through that lens, the superhero film.

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I’m surprised we haven’t done a feature on this subject yet.   I feel like prep schools are featured in movies a reasonable amount.   And to be honest I have no idea if they truly depict what a prep school life is supposed to be.

From what I can gather, an all boys school consists of rigorous studying, an intense amount of pressure to get into the right college,  making fun of teachers, and trying to to see prep school girls whenever they have a chance.  Oh and doing whatever they can to impress alumni.

Maybe that’s accurate and maybe it’s not but it makes for some pretty good movies.   That said, here are seven of my favorite prep school movies….

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The most important life lessons in Star Wars condensed into a singular poster. It beats “KEEP CALM AND CARRY ON” doesn’t it? What does that even mean?

The print is available for $24 over at Etsy, which has just made me realize how crappy the exchange rate is on the dollar. The artist, ChattyNora, also has a Harry Potter one for even cheaper that you can check out below:

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…but it is. It’s very real.

It’s an official trailer for The Phantom Menace developed specifically to aim the 3D re-release of the movie at children, who are quite literally the only target demographic who might actually be excited about it.

Before I hear the usual “So what? They’re marketing a kids movie to kids, and there’s nothing wrong with the fact Lucas wanted kids to like the new films.” Something being a “kids movie” is still NEVER an excuse for it being complete shit. The Lion King, Wall-E, Tangled, How to Train Your Dragon and more might all be “kids movies” but they’re still fantastically animated and written and can be enjoyed by all ages. A four year old might laugh at Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked, but does that mean it’s “good”? No, and the same four year old would likely laugh if you jangled keys front of him.

And the narration of this trailer is so above and beyond what you’d ever expect to hear in an official spot, you almost PRAY it’s a parody, but alas, it isn’t. Here’s to hoping the cash grabbing 3D re-release of the biggest cinematic disappointment in history somehow manages to lose money.

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Ever since I saw Drive last year, one thought crossed my mind.

I want that Jacket.

Whether it’s for Halloween, or everyday life, I thought I must have it, and I will look as cool as Ryan Gosling. Right? Right???

Well as it turns out, many others had the same thought, and I’m sorry to report that in 100% of test cases, the resulting look is “toolbox” rather than “badass.” But surely it will look awesome on me? Sadly, even with my chiseled good looks, I doubt there’s anyone else that could pull this off besides Gosling himself. I’ll keep the $160 in my pocket, and my picture off the internet.

As many of us have grown up with Star Wars, it often saddens us that Star Wars hasn’t grown up with us. The prequel movie was designed for children, and even promising new games like The Old Republic doesn’t quite capture how gritty and brutal the series could really be.

That’s where artist Kai Lim comes in. He’s stripped away all the flashy light saber fights and Jedi/Sith drama and focused purely on some of the more awesome sci-fi aspects of the series, which involve space ships and laser battles. He’s created an amazing series of artwork showing just how badass the Star Wars universe could be if we wanted it to be, and it makes me sad that Lucas doesn’t seem like he’d ever approve of something like this. It will just have to exist in comics and novels and card games (SWGTCG was what this art was created for), and someday when he dies, maybe we’ll get a movie or game like this.

See the rest of the gallery below:

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I always love discovering a great new artist online, and Patrick Brown is the man of the hour today. The comic book artist has an incredibly clean style and apparently all the same favorite video games as I do. He can go realistic, or sometimes even border on caricature, but all his pieces are amazing.

There’s a giant gallery of his best work below, and though the title says video games, there are a few famous films and shows thrown in there as well. Check them all out for yourself. What should he get to next? I’m going to go with some cool Portal art.

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I’m sure all of you watched A Christmas Story at least once during the holidays.   And during that time you clearly saw this scene.   To this day I can’t get over how funny yet random it is.

I mean how the hell did they come up with placing some random kid with goggles in a store mentioning how much he likes the tin man and Wizard of Oz.  And how about before that?  How awesome is Ralphie when he says, “Don’t bother me, I’m thinking.”

A.  This is an amazing movie and B.  I think this scene could be one of the best in Christmas Movie history.   That is all.