Aug 20 2013
Alright Dexter, congratulations. You’ve managed to go from “terrible” to “confusing,” which is something of an upgrade, I suppose. This week’s installment raised so many questions I can’t even keep track of them all, and I think that my long running theories are going to be proven false. Though I can’t explain how, exactly.
Unfortunately, to get to anything interesting happening, we had to wade through several painful scenes where Dexter and Hannah try their best to convince the audience they’re in love. After all this time, I still don’t see it, and the conversations between them in every scene were just painfully uncomfortable. The show really, really wants us to believe this is Dexter’s one true love, but there is Just. No. Chemistry. Dexter spends their conversations explaining things the audience already knows (“I’m hunting down this kid who blah blah blah”) and they talk about nicknames they have (or don’t have) for each other. Gripping stuff.
Even Hannah’s stand-off with Deb wasn’t remotely tense. After all that build up, it just came down to “You’re not gonna shoot me.” “Ugh, fine.” Like, what the hell? And don’t even get me started on the fact that Hannah is the world’s hottest internationally known fugitive, and she’s waltzing around Miami without bothering to get so much as a dye job or don a pair of sunglasses. I get suspension of disbelief, but come on.
“You didn’t even change your hair? Are you mother****ing serious?”
The big trick the night pulled was the reveal that Zack did not kill Cassie, but merely was framed for doing so via an incredibly awkward explanation involving a razor sharp car door that I still don’t quite understand. The question then becomes…who has motivation for framing Zack? The immediate thought was Quinn, but that doesn’t make a lick of sense as A) Quinn isn’t crazy enough to murder someone to catch a suspect B) he’s asking around about Zack and C) that would be f***ing stupid.
Rather, the only answer that makes sense is Vogel, who is the only other person besides Dexter and Quinn who knows Zack is a killer. But then what the hell is her motivation? Did she just want to see what Dexter would do if he thought his protégé went off the rails? Another experiment? That seems like a reach, given how much she supposedly had invested in Zack’s training, but we really know nothing about her true motives.
And of course, the evening ends with Zack being killed by the brain surgeon, who is, surprise, not that other dead serial killer with a foot fetish. Who saw that coming? The obvious notion is that Vogel is the brain surgeon killer, but that doesn’t make sense either. There have now been two scenes where Vogel has been alone and appeared shocked to find pieces of brains delivered to her. One was a few episodes back and the other was this week as she’s frowning at a piece of Zack’s brain. Why would she be play acting to an empty room unless this is just explicitly terrible writing?
Any time serial killers serve dinner I always assume someone’s eating human meat.
Rather, the only plausible theory I can come up with now is that this has something to do with her ex-husband, who is supposedly dead, and Vogel is talking about “an incident” that got her studying psychopathy that she can’t talk about. This guy could be stalking her and Dexter and Zack, and be orchestrating all this behind the scenes for…some reason. Or maybe it’s a killer who killed her husband?
But I also hate this explanation because it involves an unseen villain we know literally nothing about, and there are only four episodes left now. To spring some random villain on us at the last second would be a crappy way to end things.
So either I’m right about Vogel’s mystery man, or the show will ignore the scenes of her acting surprised and she’ll be the killer, or the mastermind is some ghost who we do know from Dexter’s past like Doakes or Lundy or Lumen or someone else whose sudden appearance they couldn’t possibly explain at this point.
“I’m doing brain surgery motherf****er!”
None of these explanations seem worthwhile to me. The show has surprised us with brilliant twists in the past, but it’s been years since they’ve really pulled one off. Could they really have some masterful endgame in mind and be hiding it this well? It’s really hard to imagine that’s the case.
I’m sad to see Zack go because he was actually really funny this episode (“Awwww gloves!”). Talk about your underdeveloped characters. I think there was potential there, once it was revealed he didn’t kill Cassie, which felt too obvious. Too bad he needed to die to throw more plot twists into the mix.
So, what are your theories? Who is the brain surgeon killer? What is Vogel’s role in all this? Where is this all heading? For once, I’m not sure of anything this season, but I’m still more worried about the explanation’s eventual stupidity than I am awaiting its brilliance.
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