May 10 2012
Star Wars: Episode VII
Speaking of struggling to exist, now we’re getting into full-on fantasy territory here. Lucas has said a million times he would never make a true sequel to Star Wars, leaving that universe to the established fiction. He’s also said he’s tired of making Star Wars movies because he’ll just get yelled at. Which is obviously true.
But what if? What if either Lucas himself finally decided he needed an even larger pile of money to swim in and made the film? Better yet, what if he passed the franchise off to someone who can actually write a script like a Nolan, Abrams or Whedon? That film, I am supremely confident, would break every record in the books.
With Lucas’s new love for 3D, you know it’d be in the format, and even though fans distrust him after the new trilogy, you can bet your ass there’d be lines wrapping around the world for Episode VII. I would think such a movie could break $200M in a weekend with ease, provided it had fantastic reviews to go along with it.
Interestingly enough however, The Phantom Menace only made $64M its opening weekend. I know reviews weren’t amazing, but that seems abnormally low when it’s a FREAKING NEW STAR WARS MOVIE and films like The Hangover open with $86M. Perhaps I’ve overestimated the appeal.
Harry Potter and the Cult of the Cullens
Alright, now I’m just being silly. I tried to come up with a way that would combine the massive appeal of both the Harry Potter and Twilight franchises, and I got the idea of a crossover that would be the single highest grossing film of all time by a factor of ten.
Potter becomes an auror after graduating Hogwarts, and must team up with Edward Cullen to take down Voldemort and his army of evil vampires. Jacob and Renesmee bond with Ron and Hermoine and I can’t really comment anymore because I don’t actually know how Twilight ends. There’s still one more stupid movie left I have to see.
In short, such a pairing would set the box office on fire, and speaking of, did I mention that there’d be a teased cameo by one Katniss Everdeen?
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