Go here to see actors Hollywood has tried, and failed, to make huge stars.

Taylor Lautner’s Abduction might be a catastrophic failure, but he’s not the first actor that Hollywood has attempted to make a star, when they didn’t really deserve it.

The Countdown

24 hardcore video game covers – [Cracked]

The Best John Carpenter moments – [UGO]

Seth Rogen makes pop culture references – [FilmDrunk]

Melissa McCarthy is hosting SNL – [WarmingGlow]

25 bizarre world currencies – [HolyTaco]

20 great english fails – [SuperBooyah]

The greatest Laguna Beach house ever – [theChive]

Naomi Watts in the girls of the day – [Maxim]

The 20 hottest celebrity sisters – [PopCrunch]

The new shake weight for guys – [Geekologie]

AC: Revelations combat trailer – [G4TV]

11 overrated jobs for guys – [BroBible]

An unsurprisingly Dark Knight spoiler – [ToplessRobot]

REM’s five best songs – [SocialHype]

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There’s a reason I’m posting this as the last official article of the week, because it’s probably going to take you all weekend (and then some) to figure it out.

Primer is a great sci-fi film, but one of the most confusing movies ever made. It takes the subject of time travel, and all the implications that follow, and lays them out in the most complicated, but accurate fashion possible. It takes a LOT of analysis to fully understand the film, and even though I thought I did, this chart proves me wrong.

Anything in this you’d care to dispute? I can imagine coming back to this post on Monday and seeing a million responses with different interpretations.

No crazy videos today, just a very worthwhile interview with South Park’s Trey Parker and Matt Stone. If you’re a fan of their work, you’ll definitely appreciate it, and I for one was glad to finally see some footage from The Book of Mormon for the first time ever. I’ve been hearing about that play for eons now, and it’s sold out through like 2021, so this will probably be the best glimpse I get of it for a long while. Until they make a movie adaptation that is.

They also talk South Park, and if you don’t know the origin story, there’s a history lesson that shows how the foul-mouthed boys came into existence. I particularly liked the old video of Parker and Stone in film school where Stone is literally wearing the exact same iconic hat that Kyle has.

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I’ve got to say, I’m pretty honored to have a photoshop this awesome dedicated to something I wrote. In one of my other jobs, I wrote a piece detailing Activision’s new plan that partners with Pepsi and lets players rack up “double XP time” by redeeming codes in Mountain Dew and Doritos. I deemed it unfair, especially early in the game as you won’t know who has been racking up kills and playing time, and who just bought a bunch of Doritos. It’s also pretty horrendous for health reasons as well, as you’re bribing people with XP in a sedentary video game by telling them to purchase unhealthy food.

Anyway, some intrepid photoshopper on Reddit decided what the next level of cross promotion between Activision and Pepsi might be, and this is the result. You may laugh, but at this point, I wouldn’t rule anything out for either company.

Is this Double XP campaign not that big of a deal, or do you agree with me that this is a slippery slope to a bad place?

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One of our favorite sites here at Unreality, DeviantArt, is having a rather awesome contest at the moment which asks its talented userbase to come up with its best Gears of War 3 fanart to win fabulous prizes.

The contest is still ongoing, but I couldn’t resist sneaking a peek, and what I saw was a wicked cool selection of pieces I knew I had to post here. Most are very highly detailed, and exceptionally well drawn. There’s a large focus on the new lady team members for obvious reasons, but the whole gang gets in on the action in some of the scenes.

Check out the full gallery below, and see even more over at the site.

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You may wonder why we here at Unreality are officially titled  ”Unreality Magazine” and our URL is subsequently www.unrealitymag.com. Well, that’s because the internet sucks, and it’s physically impossible to buy domain names you like. I’ve been trying to get ahold of unreality.com for years, but I don’t even have a way to figure out who owns it or how to contact them. And when I do? They’ll probably ask me for 20 grand.

But I decided to just embrace the concept and imagine through photoshop what it would be like if Unreality had an actual print issue that spawned out of the website. I thought about saving it for an April Fool’s joke, and claiming that we were regressing to print media, but I didn’t feel like waiting seven months to do that.

Much love to my girlfriend who will now think more than ever I legitimately have a crush on Christina Hendricks, but really she’s  just a site meme at this point.

And which Pokemon am I? Charizard, obviously.

Between this and the Up/Dead Island video, I’m just really bumming you guys out this week. Roger Ebert has called Grave of the Fireflies the saddest movie ever made, and upon that recommendation, I promptly went and watched it for myself.

It’s a Studio Ghibli feature, and as you know they’re behind classics like Princess Mononoke, Spirited Away, My Neighbor Tortoro and so on, but this is not Hayao Miyazaki directing this time around. Isao Takahata is the man in charge, and he paints a beautifully tragic picture of life for a young boy and his little sister in World War II-era Japan. As Americans (well the 60% of our readers that are Americans) we only really have one perspective on WWII, and seeing what life was like on the other side is really eye opening.

The film is pretty nonstop tragedy, with only a few brief moments of joy. It’s extremely well made, but might be a bit too intense for some. My roommate’s girlfriend came in during the last ten minutes, and even seeing nothing that came before it, she was bawling her eyes out soon enough. It’s a masterpiece of emotion told through animation, and it stands up even after 20+ years of advancements in the field. Watch at your own risk, but Grave of the Fireflies really is a must see.

There isn’t much rhyme or reason to this photo other than me thinking it’s pretty awesome.   Clearly it was taken around the time that Fight Club was being made.

And to be perfectly honest I’ve never seen this picture before.  It kind of reminds me of a Beastie Boys or some kind of Skater punk ad.   In other news, can you believe that Fight Club is already 12 years old?

I can’t.

My favorite show on television is nearly upon us:  Dexter!   Where have you been buddy?  And with the tagline “All Hell Breaks Loose” I think we’ll be in for a treat.

For 5 years we’ve been closely watching the mysterious and devious ways of one of TV’s most beloved serial killers.  Will he get caught?  Will this be the season things start to unravel?  Who knows but I know it’ll be a great ride.

I cannot wait for it to start.  And to kick it off, here are five reasons I’m psyched for it all to begin again….

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Movies tend to give a lot of advice on how best to deal with bullies, but is any of it actually good? As it turns out, the vast majority of the time, the answer is a solid no.

Check out the list here.