Mar 08 2010

Five Reasons Why My Wife Hates Juliette Lewis

Published by at 11:00 am under Columns,Editorials

Juliette

On Friday afternoon I was sitting around thinking of something to write for today and I had absolutely nothing on my mind.  I went completely blank so I attempted to source my wife for ideas.  She admitted that this wasn’t her thing but I said “just try.”  So when she said “I hate Juliette Lewis” I figured why not?

So here are my wife’s (word for word) reasons for hating Juliette Lewis.

1.  “Ok, she dated Brad Pitt and he’s a million times hotter than she is.”

2.  “Ummm, I think she’s very unattractive, she’s so ugly.”

3.  “She used to be on this TV show, like in the 80s (I Married Dora), and that’s where I saw her and thought she was the worst actress ever.”

4.  “Can you help me?”

5.  “Her whiny, annoying voice.”

So there you have it.  My wife’s one hell of a muse.  Personally I’m not a huge fan of Lewis either.  I don’t really hate her but I can understand how that whiny, long, drawn out way of talking that she has can affect people.  Plus if you’ve ever seen her in the movie What’s Eating Gilbert Grape you will not like her, at all.  My wife just said “Oh my God yeah, that’s so true.”

P.S. I attached a very annoying music video after the jump

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xKgbM9eT2ik

Nice Feathers





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23 responses so far

  • Roy

    mmmm, juliette lewis, haba haba!

  • Bert

    I’m with you and your wife – I’ve hated her in every damn role I’ve seen her in. From Christmas Vacation to From Dusk Till Dawn to Cape Fear to Old School, she is simply godawful.

  • Nattyb

    Thanks Bert. I knew someone was with me.

  • Tron

    Plus she’s a scientologist.

  • Bert

    @ Natty – no problem. In fact, I’m pretty sure she’s the reason I’ve never seen Natural Born Killers, despite the fact that I’ve never seen a bad Woody Harrelson movie.

    @ Tron – great point! I forgot about that. She’s apparently responsible for converting Jason Lee and Ethan Suplee (Randy on My Name is Earl) as well. And that’s terrible.

  • MacGyver1138

    I wouldn’t say I hate her, but I don’t particularly like her. Her voice is annoying, for sure.

  • IcemanD

    I’m not sure the “hate” accurately describes my absolute disdain for this woman. Her voice is like finger nails on a chalkboard. She has ruined so many otherwise awesome movies for me.

  • IcemanD

    I’m not sure the WORD “hate”…

    I need to proof read more.

  • Drester

    Am I the only one who finds her cute? You’re showing the ugliest picture ever.

  • matt

    She is a bit annoying but I really dug Natural Born Killers, though not so much her in that movie. she is alright when she is playing annoying white trash otherwise she has no place in a flick. Basically the only word that describes how I feel about her is nothing. I nothing Juliette Lewis.

  • Chumplunt

    Maybe her songs wouldn’t be so bad if she sang from her mouth, and not from her vagina (Top pic)

  • r money

    I’m not a huge fan of her but Natural Born Killers is a fantastic movie

  • mikey

    I think the scientology is the only thing that turns me off.

    I like everything else, including the voice!

  • matius53

    I have always hated her. In fact if you asked me who I hate in showbiz, she’s gonna be my first answer. She couldn’t act her way out of a paper bag. I’ve always thought that someone should stomp on her and grind her into the ground like a cigarette.

  • captain

    Ok, which one of you HATERS tried to kill her with your car last night? :-P
    I like the “I nothing Juliette Lewis” comment. In fact, I was thinking that exact thing when she, in the “Feather” video, pushes throughout the three guys… “Why are they even giving her an iota of attention? That’s why she is behaving so badly. Ignore her and move on.”

  • Emily

    Natural Born Killers ruled and could not have been what it is without her. See the movie, and change your mind.
    and Kalifornia. Kalifornia was also great.
    Not too bad in Whip It either.
    And she was great in Starsky and Hutch.

  • Richard

    Asking a woman what she hates about another woman is not a legitimate exercise.
    Women are programed to hate each other.
    If JL was a man, she would be hailed as a great artist. Nobody has gone from film star to rock star with any success.
    JL is a badass. She rocks hard.

  • jenni

    Juliette Lewis is a straight up amazing front woman, I saw her band before “MUSE”. I was pre-embarrassed for her until I actually saw her. She was the bomb. As an actress I haven’t seen her in anything since she was a lot younger. But I always thought she seemed unique. Oh and the other reason I like her: I used to work at Starbucks in LA and she is the only actress who ever tipped besides Carol Burnett. So I like her. I do think it’s frikkin wierd she’s a scientologist though.

  • Dana

    I totally disagree. I love her and don’t think one thing ur wife said is true. Not to mention the picture you chose isn’t a good one and you’re wife’s first reason for “hating” her is pretty shallow.

  • http://www.nanobots500.com Jimbot

    I was about to say pretty much what Dana says.
    I think she’s pretty cool and she makes a better stab at crossing over from actor to rock singer than amy of her contempraries. She atkes chances with her career and lives by them.
    Your wife sounds incredibly shallow and a wee bit nasty if her comments were meant to be anything other than tongue in cheek.
    Not liking her for not being “hot” (and we could argue that one till the cows come home!) is bad enough but for being in a movie? She’s acting, duh…

    Is she REALLY a Scientologist…? Now, THAT would be a good reason!

  • Just a Guest

    OK… One by one…

    1. “Ok, she dated Brad Pitt and he’s a million times hotter than she is.”

    Uhhh, the ONLY H-O-T girl Brad dated is Angelina. I’ll be shallow like your wife and point out that I’m sure she’s not as hot as Juliette–and definitely NOT as hot as Angelina…or even the Chin/Aniston. (NONE of us are as hot as Angelina…)

    2. “Ummm, I think she’s very unattractive, she’s so ugly.”

    She’s so ugly? I guess your wife would think Einstein is dumb b/c he was ugly and looked nothing like Brad Pitt. I love Keanu, but he’s not a good actor. Does she think he’s a good actor b/c he’s hot?

    3. “She used to be on this TV show, like in the 80s (I Married Dora), and that’s where I saw her and thought she was the worst actress ever.”

    Don’t do what I did. I didn’t see The Princess Bride in the theaters b/c I hated Cary Elwes in Lady Jane. I TOTALLY missed out. Capisce/Capiche?

    4. “Can you help me?”

    Um, I don’t know. Can I???

    5. “Her whiny, annoying voice.”

    Has your wife ever seen a movie with Joey Lauren Adams? What about Rosie Perez? Jennifer Tilly?

  • howdigetfromgoogleimagestohere

    If anything she comes across a little intimidating which is why she puts me off a bit but I really liked her in Natural Born Killers.
    She’s great! Plus I really like her singing voice/stage persona. She def. grows on you.

  • yelp46

    She plays the same white trash moron in every movie. She demeans white trash morons by being a far worse off idiot with an annoying voice

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