Why am I featuring this as our lead link for the weekend instead of some hot actress? Because I hate Rob Zombie. I just watched House of 1000 Corpses AND The Devils Rejects this week, and they just might be the two worst horror movies I’ve ever seen. And if I go see Halloween II this weekend? I might just die of gore/stupidity overload.

Anyways, go here if you also think Rob Zombie should go away.

The Countdown:

Puppies dressed as cats on Conan – [Warming Glow]

The 25 creepiest horror movie posters – [Gunaxin]

15 of the weirdest magazines still in publication – [Asylum]

The best bartender in the world – [Manofest]

How not to keep your PC cool – [DJMick]

Star Wars 90210 – [Atom]

Rooming with a town hall protester – [Throwkickpunch]

10 signs you might be a douche – [COED]

Quentin Tarantino might be out of his mind, but the man sure does know film and film criticism. Here’s a particularly interesting video of him reviewing There Will Be Blood, which was directed by his good friend,  Paul Thomas Anderson.

Things he loves:

- Daniel Day Lewis (duh)

- The soundtrack

- The lack of movie “set pieces”

Things he hates:

- Paul Dano

Poor Paul Dano, he’s only been in like two movies, and he has to listen to himself getting torn apart by Quentin Tarantino? That’s heartbreaking. I actually thought Dano did a bangup job, seeing as in his last movie he only said three words in an hour and a half.

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qszzV1tkzoE

I thought that Men Who Stare at Goats was just going to be one of those movies where the title is a metaphor for something, and never translates literally in the film. Well, that’s until I watched George Clooney kill a goat with his mind just now.

I’ve no idea what this movie is or where it came from, but it’s got a solid cast including Kevin Spacey, Jeff Bridges, Ewan McGregor, Aaron from 24 and Clooney. I was stunned to find out that this is in fact not a Coen Brothers film. Which in my opinion is for the best. Psychic Jedi U.S. Army soldiers? Sign me up.

From artist Rick Baker comes an image that no one who ever wants to make it through life with their childhood intact should ever see. I’ve seen realistic depictions of Mario and Homer Simpson, but this one takes the cake due to its exceptionally creepy pedo vibe.

I’d actually want to see other characters rendered as well, but Olive Oyl would probably look too much like a Holocaust survivor and Bluto would be be Mark McGuire.

I am probably going to be old someday.   Hopefully most of you will be old someday.  And I hope that in my old age that I can appreciate how old I am.  By appreciate I mean make fun of myself.    Let’s take Betty White or Cloris Leachman for example.  These are women in their 80s who consistently poke fun at how old they are.

I can only hope to have a sense of humor like that if I make it to their ages.  When it comes to movies, old age is sometimes poked at.  But not often.  I guess it’s because none of us really want to die.

But with a little creativity we can take even the youngest of movies and make them “old.”

Enjoy

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Why make furniture inspired by video games? Either you’re bored, crafty or the biggest nerd in the world, but in all probability a combination of all three.  These designs range from homemade, to art deco, to possibly photoshopped, but they’re all worth looking at in one form or another.

Observe, and let me know if I’ve missed any, but I searched far and wide.

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It’s time for another cosplay gallery here at Unreality.  If you haven’t noticed, we’re big fans.  I like to laugh at the crappy and pathetic attempts, but I also admire the attention to detail and complex efforts of the more, um, successful cosplayers.

I read a lot of X-Men comics when I was younger, and to be honest, I never gave too much thought to Kurt Wagner, better known as Nightcrawler.  It wasn’t until seeing Alan Cumming portray the teleporting mutant in X2: X-Men United that I realized what a cool look he had.  It’s somewhat ironic that a blue, devilish-looking mutant would actually look cooler on the big screen than in the pages of a comic book; it almost always seems to be the opposite with a lot of non-human characters.  The costume and makeup department of X2 did an outstanding job on Nightcrawler, but what about the thousands of cosplayers out there?  Afterthe jump, take a look at their efforts in an awesome gallery of Nightcrawler cosplay.

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We could go on and on about all the ways Hollywood ****s up movies supposedly based on true stories. There’s nothing Hollywood does worse than realism.

But it works the other way, also. It turns out some of the most grossly unrealistic characters–from over-the-top crime bosses to gimmicky serial killers to flamboyant, wise-cracking cops–were based on real people. Characters like…

Go here to see what movie characters actually exist in real life.

The deadly, ass-kicking Summer Glau reunites with Joss Whedon at long last? I’m there. Now I’m almost glad Sarah Connor Chronicles got cancelled. Just kidding, it’s still a tragedy.

Go here to see what role she’ll be playing.

The Countdown:

Jamie Chung should be in more movies – [on205th]

With a trip into space courtesy of Guiness. Really – [DJMick]

Robert Pattinson shower is not what you’d imagine – [FilmDrunk]

The dark history of Batman in video games – [Asylum]

100 years of movie special effects in five minutes – [Manofest]

10 awesome movies to get into a girl’s pants – [BOH]

5 excuses for owning Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition – [Cracked]

The best original film scores ever – [Gunaxin]

Alright, I’m done. For some reason, this Megan Fox is Catwoman story has been the straw that’s broken the camel’s back for me. I’ve heard Eddie Murphy as the Riddler, Philip Seymour Hoffman as the Penguin and Miley Cyrus as Batgirl, but Fox as Catwoman? It’s one thing to make up a completely unbelievable lie, you stupid tabloid rag, The Sun, but to make one that is easily enough believed by the masses so you get a bunch of page views despite it being completely made up? **** you.

I’m not going to link to the story, but many sites have, and even Fox News picked it up, bastions of journalistic integrity that they are. There should be a law against just making things up to further paper sales and website traffic, even if the story isn’t slanderous. It makes the rest of us who are trying to report the actual news look like chumps when you can just make stuff up and get 10x our traffic. I’m sick of it.