Aug 26 2009

Come On ‘Vampire’s Assistant,’ I’m Trying to Like You!

Published by Paul Tassi at 12:00 pm under Movies

vampires-assistant-poster.jpg

So why did you come out with this horrendously shitty poster? Whatever this kid’s name is, he’s not remotely cute or a Robert Pattinson look-a-like, so you’re not going to trick Twi-tards into seeing this. And John C. Reily is certainly not Taylor Lautner.

This movie looks to be a welcome, fresh take on a genre taken over by stupidity and teenagers, so don’t go mucking it up. I think I can make out Salma Hayek, but who the hell is that behind her? He’s so damn small I need to blow this thing up in photoshop just to see who it is. And I’m still going to go with “vague fog man” after further investigation.




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5 responses so far

5 Responses to “Come On ‘Vampire’s Assistant,’ I’m Trying to Like You!”

  1. Madisonon 26 Aug 2009 at 1:05 pm

    I don’t get why Reilly isn’t front and center in this poster. After Step Brothers, I’m willing to give a chance to any comedy he’s in.

  2. Joshon 26 Aug 2009 at 1:09 pm

    Who gives a shit about the poster? It’s John C. Reilly not doing an Apatow movie and, perhaps, returning to his amazing acting skills. I am really looking forward to this.

    (Sidenote: Don’t get me wrong, I -loved- Talledega Nights, Step Brothers, and Walk Hard but… seriously, the man absolutely DOMINATED the 2002 Academy Awards. Three of his films were nominated for Best Picture and he got a Best Supporting Actor nod. Not to mention he was also nominated for a Grammy for the Walk Hard song. The man is incredibly talented and lately he hasn’t been living up to that talent. This looks like a step in the right direction, at least, even if it will end up being a kid’s film which I think it will)

  3. SirEdwardon 26 Aug 2009 at 1:12 pm

    The fiance and I recently re-watched Gangs of New York and were maybe.. oh.. 40 seconds into it when both of our jaws dropped. There’s John C. Reilly. Acting intimidating. A movie I love very much, an actor I love very much, and I had no idea they had once done the dance of film together.

  4. Paul Tassion 26 Aug 2009 at 2:29 pm

    Whaaaaaaaaat? *mind blown*

  5. Frankon 29 Aug 2009 at 3:24 am

    I heard this year or next year there making a spoof on twilight. lol you can check out a spoof on youtube made by some kids REEEAAALLLLY funny lay off bro its just a stupid poster

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