May 19 2009
In my estimation, the ability to move things with the mind is by far the coolest superpower (suck it flying!). The possibilities are practically endless for the types of things you could do, and the issue has been covered in film many times, although not as many as you’d think.
I’m sure I’m missing a few here and there, but I think I’ve gotten most of the major movie telekinetics here. I’ve ranked them in order of least powerful to most, from those who can move pencils to those who can obliterate cities.
Side note: Is telekinetic the proper term for one who has the power of telekinesis? I didn’t think “psychic” or “telepath” was appropriate, but let me know.
10) George Malley (Phenomenon)
This is the most realistic depiction of what it would be like if someone actually got telekinesis in real life, but it’s also the mildest. George’s powers only extended to twirling glasses around or making pens roll. At his peak he made a mirror shatter.
George’s powers were better served creating alternative energy sources (yeah, even back in the nineties) and predicting earthquakes. Telekinesis was just a side effect of his massive intelligence (and brain tumor, spoilers!).
9) Matilda (Matilda)
Out of all of these choices, I think Matilda may be my favorite telekinetic on the list. She uses the power the way a kid actually would, helping out her friends and screwing over her mean parents and teachers. Sure she’s not going to level any cities, but convincing her evil headmistress that her house is haunted by making a painting of her dead relative attack her is pretty hilarious.
8 ) Mary Poppins (Mary Poppins)
Many will argue with me that Mary Poppins is a witch, and not a telekinetic, but you’re wrong. She has powers the same as everyone else on this list, and just because this movie is crazy old, doesn’t mean it’s not hip with the psychic superpowers of the present.
Normally she only uses her powers to do things like clean rooms and reprimand children, but the fact that she can use the ability to make herself fly propels her above the last two entrants on the list.
7) Alice (Resident Evil Apocalypse)
I was never really clear on when exactly Alice got telekinetic powers. I think it was the third movie, but I’m not positive. In any case, she does the typical “throw things around” maneuver that all telekinetics know and love, and as I recall she has some sort of psychic mind blast as well.
Details are fuzzy here so let me know if I’m getting this wrong, but I don’t think she uses her powers that extensively, making her sort of lame.
6) Nick (Push)
Now we’re really getting into the “combat telekinetics” who use their powers less for amusement and more for kicking ass. Unfortunately, Nick’s powers in mediocre superhero thriller Push aren’t exactly the stuff of legend.
He’s got a neat force push, the ability to hover guns above his head and aim them poorly, and some kinetic punches and elbows that look pretty neat, but he’s still on the shallow end of the power scale.
5) Yoda (The Empire Strikes Back)
Yes, shut up. The Force is totally telekinesis. That being said, I had to think of the most powerful Jedi we’ve seen onscreen. If we were expanding into video games it would probably be Whats-His-Face Starkiller from The Force Unleashed, who can capsize entire Star Destroyers with his mind, but I’m sticking to the movies.
I’m picking Yoda here, because I think he has a better overall understanding of the Force than the Emperor and Vader even with their lighting and choking. The best demonstration of his power would have to be his lifting of Luke’s X-Wing out of the swamp, but I bet he could do way more if he wanted to.
4) Mewtwo (Pokemon: The First Movie)
Yeah, that’s right, Pokemon mother****ers. I’m going there. Mewtwo is a genetically engineering mammal with a hefty psychic ability. He can obliterate Team Rocket’s headquarters without batting an eyelash and has a mean psychic beam that will blow your head clean off. Well, if this wasn’t a G-rated cartoon that is.
3) Carrie (Carrie)
For being a scared little high school girl for most of the movie, Carrie is one of the most powerful figures on this list. Let’s see, she literally trapped her classmates in a burning gym, cooking them all as revenge for getting a blood bucket dumped on her, she stopped her mom’s heart with her mind and then as a grand finale, sucked her entire house into hell. Not bad.
2) Jean Grey/Phoenix (X-Men: The Last Stand)
In the third X-Men movie, Jean Grey was so ridiculously overpowered as Phoenix that you had to wonder why any of the other mutants even bothered showing up. She had graduated from telekinetically helping Cyclops skeet shoot clay pigeons to literally turning him into ash. She also ate up Professor X and a whole host of other mutants, cars and buildings in the grand finale, before Wolverine gutted her. Really, that’s all it took?
1) Akira (Akira)
When I first sat down to write this list, I thought for sure that Phoenix would be number one. Then I remembered Akira.
His psychic powers are so massive, he’s considered a weapon of mass destruction and he singlehandedly levels the entire city of Tokyo in the film, sparking World War III. Seeing that there is absolutely nothing else that can compete with that, so therefore I crown Akira the king of all telekinetics in the history of ever.
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