Remember when computer games like King’s Quest and Space Quest required you to enter commands instead of simply pointing and clicking?  “Don’t Sh*t Your Pants” is exactly like that, but the goal is, uh, self-explanatory.  Have fun on Washington’s birthday with this free game from kongregate.com (via Kotaku).  There’s something like ten possible endings to this “game;” see how many you can get.  I quit playing after I managed to take a dump on the floor.  Click HERE to play!