Feb 13 2009

The New Generation of Buff Action Actors is Pretty Weak

Published by at 10:45 am under Lists

Jacked Actors

I miss the 80’s action star.  I miss how tough these guys used to be.  I mean you just couldn’t mess with the likes of Sylvester Stallone, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Dolph Lundgren, and even Jean Claude Van Damme.  These guys were just flat out monsters.  Hell you could even add Carl Weathers to the mix.

You see back in the 80’s, little things like steroids didn’t really matter.    I would assume that guys like Stallone had bushels of this stuff on set.  And it paid off.  I mean these guys were borderline WWF (yes it was WWF at the time) wrestler size.

Today?  Today’s actors are more “ripped” than big.  Today’s actor looks more “in shape” than dangerous.  It’s kind of like comparing a Mac Truck to an SUV.  Sure the SUV is fast and sleek but the Mac Truck is way more badass.

So here are seven of the new breed of buff actors that even I wouldn’t be afraid to fight

Hugh Jackman

Jacked Actors

I am by no means denying that Wolverine is about as badass character as they come.  And look, Hugh Jackman is a handsome guy,  he plays the part well, and yeah, he’s in great shape.  But let’s be real here.  He’s a broadway actor who can sing well and is hosting the Oscars this year.  Would you ever really pin him up against Rambo?

Christian Bale

Jacked Actors

Once again, I’m not denying that Batman isn’t tough.  Hell even Pat Bateman was ripped.  But come on, you really think that this guy could take Lincoln Hawk in an arm wrestling match?  There’s just no way.  I think Bale’s most jacked character was in the movie Reign of Fire.

Jason Statham

Jacked Actors

Once again.  Here’s a very ripped guy. This is someone I probably wouldn’t mess with in real life.  Something tells me Statham knows martial arts and it’s not just from movies.  He’s got a very tough, almost Bruce Willis look.  And of all the action guys on this list he’s probably my pick for the most badass.  However, put him in the ring against Ivan Drago and I give him 30 seconds.

Daniel Craig

Jacked Actors

Oh come on now.  Yeah he’s a slick James Bond action star but lets be real here.  If you’re sending him into the jungle to take on the Predator the guy is definitely wetting himself.

Ryan Reynolds

Jacked Actors

When Van Wilder is pretty much the most jacked guy in Hollywood we’ve got a serious problem.  And honestly?  I think that Reynolds may literally be the most muscular big named actor in Hollywood right now.  And that’s just really sad.

Vin Diesel

Jacked Actors

Diesel is a pretty big dude.  Or at least he used to be much bigger.  Can’t one of these guys just take a cycle and get all huge on us?  Like what Ed Norton did for American History X.   But imagine an already big guy doing it.  That’s what we need damnet.

Dwayne Johnson – The Rock

Jacked Actors

Perfect example of the power of steroids.  In Johnson’s first few flicks after the WWE, I guess his muscles hadn’t deflated yet.  He would be my pick for guy most likely to resurrect the Schwarzenegger guy.  However, his character moved in a totally different direction.  He’s tiny now.  At least compared to what he used to look like.

*and by the way Michael Clark Duncan is huge but he does zero action films.





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25 responses so far

  • http://bodycountblog.blogspot.com krazy9000

    The sad part is that Sly, even in his 60’s, is STILL more ripped than any of these dudes!

  • CEC

    The difference between these actors, and the one’s from the 80’s, is that some of these guys can actually act. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a fan of the classics, especially Arnold’s films. He’s practically invented the genre in my opinion and won’t really be topped. But let’s be honest, their acting abilities leave much to be desired. You may say that doesn’t matter, you just want to see some huge bad ass dudes that look like they can rip some shit apart and who you wouldn’t want to fuck with. Sure…I’ll grant you that is fun to see sometime. But it takes more than huge to make a real bad ass character. I mean…sure…Sly was/is way bigger than Jackman and could probably kick his ass without much trouble….but Wolverine is a waaay more bad ass character than Rambo. As is Vin Diesels Riddick.

    Van Damme, for example, is someone I would never want to fuck with in real life, but he’s never done a character that I would ever classify as bad ass……

    It takes acting skill to make a really bad ass character sometimes….even if the person playing him isn’t as bad ass in person.

  • Orleanas

    Right on CEC!

  • Surg

    what about Michael Jai White from “undisputed 2″ “universal Soldier” and “spawn”

    http://freshplays.files.wordpress.com/2008/06/michael-jai-iwhite-2.jpg

  • b

    the emphasis on being unnaturally huge in this over any other quality kinda makes me feel sad for the author.

  • rob

    Wow.

    Jackman is 6’3. In real life the guy is fricking huge.

    He is actually a bigger guy then Sly. He is 8 nches taller and WAY bigger. Jackman ROCKS as wolverine and Just because the guy has acted in a few broadway plays you are dis-crediting him. WTF is wrong with you?

    so,what you are saying is a action stars needs to be the size of a power lifter? Thats retarded. I love the classis but the new wave is plenty good.

  • Madison

    @ rob

    Jackman’s fine as an action star. The problem is that his Wolverine is terrible.

  • John

    Each to his own, but I think Terry Crews is the most ripped Movie Star out there.

    http://www.thahotseat.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/terry-crews-e.jpg

  • Madison

    @ John

    He’s huge, and he’s a really funny guy to boot.

  • Chris

    Micheal Jai White is the biggest right now. i just watched Blood and Bone and the guy is huge. Also lots of really muscular guys in that movie.

    I definetly agree that we need more really buff guys in hollywood, this craze over guys with a six pac and people calling them “ripped” and “huge” makes a bodybuilder like myself sick.

    Any skinny guy can get a six pack in 4 weeks.

  • Madison ☺

    I am in uv’z wif Dwayne Johnson. He is soooo hottttt and hansome!!!!!

  • yo

    guy who wrote this whole thing….., you are a faggot

  • Andrew

    Statham vs. Drago I give DRAGO 30 seconds

  • TheAce

    I agree, Except for the bit about getting wasted by the predator, Remember Danny Glover smoked a P in Close combat. But yep I miss the hulking steroided monstars of yesteryear. I mean even the new “Predators” movie kinda lets me down I mean it looks like the old film in the shorts but with weak guys etc. I dont know I just wanna pay to see larger than life guys doing larger than life things. Not the dude that sits across from you in the subway. You know what I mean?

  • Drake

    80’s actions stars were definitely badass and there’s still a few guys like that running around (ex. Michael Jai White, John Cena), but sadly badass is no longer a key ingredient to being an action star.

    Today, fancy martial arts moves have replaced the “old school” quality of just looking like you could ruin somebody’s s**t. Back in the day, Arnold and Dolph looked dangerous before they even threw a punch; you just didn’t want to f’k with those guys.

    Today’s action star also needs sex appeal, and looking like you could bench press a tank engine apparently isn’t very sexy. For that matter, speech impediments probably don’t rank very high on the sexy scale either.

    I think the running consensus is if you have a good set of six pack abs and can pull off a lone wolf persona, everything else can be CGI’d.

    I’m also pretty sure most fans of the genre saw this coming. You had to have known a paradigm shift was in the works when 120lb women with no superpowers were cast as being able to kick trained soldiers asses (ex. Xena, Tomb Raider, Kill Bill). I don’t care what kung-fu master Uma Thurman studied under, a 60 year-old angry Scotsman with a well placed headbutt would have ended her “quest for vengance” before it even got started.

    Hollywood no longer takes a badass and turns them into a star, they take an actor and dress them up as a pseudo-badass. It’s just the way things are done now.

  • Andrew

    @ Drake It seems like you are just saying that there are two types of badass; “old school” and “new school”. However, you aren’t saying that the new school guys aren’t badass, just not your “kind” of badass. Also I would disagree with your hyperbole that CGI can fix everything. As Jason Statham is my favorite “new school” badass that I can think of at the moment, he is my example. You think Jason Statham needs CGI created “magic” to be badass? Have you SEEN the first Transporter? You think the oil that was on him during one of the memorable fights was CGI or something? Like I said before, I disagree with the author and say that I give the guy who played Drago 30 seconds against Statham.

  • Ted

    Uuuhhhh… “the guy who played Drago,” is Dolph Lundgren. 6 foot 5, 245 pounds, at the time. Former Swedish power lifting finalist, and 2 time European karate champion. I actually like Statham a lot more than Lundgren, as an actor. But I’d bet on Dolf to beat Statham to death TODAY. In 1985, it would have been a massacre.

  • Andrew

    @Ted well I’m sorry I haven’t seen all of the Rocky movies and don’t know the name of an actor who isn’t very good(notice how I said ACTOR). But Statham isn’t a slouch when it comes to mixed martial arts, as he is well-trained in MMA and is a world class kickboker (I don’t know exactly what “well-trained” means in terms of what he is an expert in other than kick boxing as I have never found out any specifics, but I’d wager pretty damn good.)

  • Andrew

    Well what I actually read was that Statham is an EXPERT in kickboxing but I figure expert and world class are close enough to the same thing for sake of this conversation.

  • coops

    i’m sorry but dolph lundgren would absolutely destroy statham, not even close

  • Mosquito

    I beg to differ. I’m a big fan of the old 80s action flicks, too, and I’m a devoted Dolph follower for a few decades. But that doesn’t mean that I don’t like todays action stars. The Rock actually looks better now that he’s leaner as during his wrestling times. Chris says: “this craze over guys with a six pac and people calling them “ripped” and “huge” makes a bodybuilder like myself sick.” Oh well, look at today’s bodybuilders compared to Arnie’s era as a pro. Arnie was huge but he wass also very nicely V-shaped and sculptured. Today especially U.S. bodybuilders go for mass, mass, mass no matter what. I look at the oversized legs and the straight lines from ears to shoulders and think it’s appalling. I don’t want that on film, thanks. Maybe that’s the big diffference today: People want heroes that are still very special but not super-human (except for Wolverine) :-)

  • Adrian

    You need to do a bit more research. In just one example I’ll point out your lack of actual information.

    Christian Bale was just over 220.lbs when playing Batman in The Dark Night.

    Sylvester Stallone said (and you can find the interview online) that in his best shape for Rocky (Rocky 4) he weighed in at a whopping 168.lbs

    Doesn’t sound like Bale was that “weak” or in need of steroids.

  • abc

    1st: it’s just your personal opinion
    2nd:did you really think deeply before you wrote this whole thing?
    3nd: they’re weak, huh, so you are strong and you can beat them in an arm wrestling match…?
    finally: you’re a faggot, f*** you, man…

  • YourMOM!!

    REALLY???? have you seen Dwayne in his two new movies (Faster , Fast Five) he’s way more jacked than anyone now! he could snap everyone’s necks like twigs, but the only problem is I’m pretty sure he doesn’t have training in like martial arts haha

  • Brad

    Most action stars from the 80s were body builders or something of that nature prior to becoming actors. today most action directors take trained actors rather than athletes (minus duwayne johnson who cant act for shit). of course Arnie and Van Damme in their prime could rip guys like Jackman and Bale in half but put them on stage with those two and they will look like a bunch of steriod abusing apes. back n the 80s there was less emphasis on character and more on the action. nowadays its either a good story with decent action and ok .great acting. and tbh i prefer the latter.

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